I just found out the person I thought was stalking me on a p*** site wasnt who I thought it was. That means I humiliated myself for no reason. That means she wasn’t stalking me because of the p***. That means it’s possible that I just got catfished and everything else that i thought was the truth was really just my brain finding patterns. She wasn’t falling for me. The photos weren’t for me. She wasn’t watching my twitch stream. She wasnt addicted to pills and booze. She wasnt the one who emailed me. She’s not a malignant narcissist playing games with me. She probably just thinks im a lunatic for still having been obsessed with her after so much time had passed. I f****** can’t bro. I’m so f****** cringe its actually painful. I barely knew her. I really gotta move on. Being lucid is f****** trash. I miss being delusional at least I didn’t have to deal with the realization of how f****** tapped I am. It was all delusions. Holy s***.