When I was incarcerated in an ultra max security asylum I was stabbed. This wasn’t supposed to happen because it was a super strict environment. An inmate who was working in the kitchen came up with a very sneaky idea which baffled even the most intelligent asylum staff. He later confessed that after having a quick bowel movement in the kitchen he molded a knife that he made from a piece of poop and stored it in the freezer. He simply waited until it was frozen and stabbed me in the back with it. This pissed me off and I later beat the s*** out of him. What will they think of next?