OUT ON BAIL! Just got bailed out by my cis girlfriend after more than a week in lockup with some of the nastiest, dirtiest most jizzalicious HUNG Sambo blacks and spicy SUCIO Latinos!

Once the homies saw me walking in they all started cheering and trading for dibs. The first jailhouse SUCKOFF I performed fetched 2 honeybuns, 3 coffee packets and a cup o noodles!

As I was leaving the bailiff remarked that all of the inmates were going to miss “Old Lips & Lungs” and my cis lady asked later what he meant. I told her that I was singing and whistling old time standards for the fellas and they gave me that nickname… Little did she know the only thing that was singing and whistling was my poor keysterhole!

Simply,

CORVALLUS