Don’t kill yourself. Things get better, I tried to kill myself once and I’m glad I failed because things got a lot better and I met my wife a year later.

The birds they sang
At the break of day
Start again
I heard them say
Don’t dwell on what has passed away
Or what is yet to be

Ring the bells that still can ring
Forget your perfect offering
There is a crack, a crack in everything
That’s how the light gets in

That’s from a song called Anthem by Leonard Cohen. Check it out, it will do you a lot of good right now. Also Speeding Cars by Imogen Heap. I heard that song the night I tried to kill myself, it probably saved my life. Good luck!