4 years
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Pointless rant from an admitted s***** sociopath. I both fully immerse in yet detach from s**. I focus on sensations I receive and response from those I evoke sensations in. I refuse to accept lack of o***** from someone yet only rarely give them mine because it is too vulnerable for me. Love the foreplay sensations but c****** for someone makes my skin crawl. So most of my orgasms are from me. And I take my time with it. When p*** is involved, which is rare, I am only watching the woman’s facial expressions (which is mostly fake so welcome to why p*** bores me most days). My rant? I was bouncing around to see if any p*** caught my interest and no it didnt. I watched a close up oral c****** compilation. Sensual slow so you could see ever twitch of the c*** and contraction of the balls. Only one woman actually expressed a subtle smile as the c*** came for her. She clearly liked having that pride of accomplishment. The rest of them usually just let it fall out of their mouths and wtf. Do youbhave any idea how little s**** a man produces in his lifetime and you waste and disrespect it/him looe that? While women expect a man to perform like an olympian (and truth be known i usually happily dive into a woman ears deep, I f****** love drowning in a p****). And more honest context…dont hit me with “but s**** is gross….” in my explorations seeking something besides giving oral to grasp for a s***** connection, i have sucked a c*** or 12 in my life, and swallowing was completely natural. Rant over.

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My art therapist/group therapist and I were having an illegal affair. I would write secret messages to her and she would read them and respond to them in person. She would do favors i asked of her, like wearing outfits i asked her to wear, she’d even do me s***** favors. I made her a google drive full of p*** of me and then crafted a puzzle link to get to it that only she could have known. The link was a tinyurl with three phrases in the url that only she could have known. We would walk for an hour every day and swing at the park. I would write her poetry and play love songs for her every day. She broke the rules to play mario kart with me constantly when her boss was out. We had something magical. But she would never communicate directly with me because sge was afraid she’d lose her liscence to practice and her boyfriend and house, abd when I pushed her to unmask and be real, she told me I was wasting my time. Well that pissed me off and I crashed out a little abd she used that crash out to get me kicked out of my group therapy program. She wants out and I told her she’s not allowed to want out. I told her If she doesn’t reach out to me and continue this affair, that i will report her and get her liscence taken away and if that doesn’t work ill find some other way to ruin her life. You dont go from gooning in the bathroom at work to someone to throwing them away in the same week. Thats fucked. I’ll post her name here soon if she stays quiet and doesn’t reach out to me.