I’m a guy but I honestly feel like I can’t admit to anyone how much pain I feel with the loss of so many friends over so many years. I have worked EMS for over 8 years, In a small town and most of my patients have been good friends of mine or at least acquaintances who I would consider good friends. I have given up the volunteer service that I had been on and still every funeral that I attend afterward seems to add on to my grief for those I care about. I gave my service for 8 years because I wouldn’t want anyone to be cared for by anyone whom would not give or fight with their all to make sure that they survived but I simply cannot any longer. I have given everything that I can, But I don’t know how I can actually convey that to my nephew who wants to work EMS He’s only 5 years old but that’s what he wants to be in the future. I have no idea how I could encourage him in this direction and also explain why I no longer work in this field as a volunteer.