it feels like you're ignoring me and it fucking hurts. every time we plan to hang out you end up canceling to hang out with your friends at the last

4 years

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it feels like you’re ignoring me and it f****** hurts. every time we plan to hang out you end up canceling to hang out with your friends at the last minute. we’re in a long distance relationship for fucks sake and you get to see these assholes on campus multiple times a week!! we haven’t hung out in over a MONTH. it’s always “sorry hun i’m just so busy with work and class” yet I can see you’ve been playing games on discord for 4 f****** hours. if you can make time for video games you can make time for your f****** boyfriend. i thought it meant something to you when i sent you roses on our 3 year anniversary. thought it meant something when we finally had our first kiss in person last june. i thought you’d stop and listen when i told you that i was feeling s***** and missed you instead of basically going “damn, that s****” and immediately beginning to rant about your interests for an hour straight. do i not get to talk about the things that interest me?? you get to talk about your games and s*** for f****** ever but the second i bring up mine your only response is “you’re so cute” and then you change the subject and circle back to your s***??? im f****** pissed off. i would talk to you about this like a mature adult but i know the second i bring it up you’d start the self deprecating “oh i guess im just a horrible boyfriend, im so terrible, you should just leave me, i hurt everyone, you don’t deserve this” s*** you ALWAYS pull instead of actually fixing the issue and paying more attention to me or actually, you know, keeping your word when you promise we’re going to hang out instead of canceling on me for your friends? i would absolutely understand if this was a rare thing but it’s happened the last 3 times we’ve made plans now. you can’t even use the “i never have time to hang out with them” excuse because you see them a very minimum of 2 times a week for club meetings. so you know what? im not going to talk to you about this like a mature adult until YOU decide to start acting like a mature adult. if the universe wanted me to be the bigger person then i would have been made taller than 5’0″. i’m gonna start dropping you for MY friends at the last minute. i’m gonna tell YOU that i’m too busy with homework to hang out and then play video games alone for the next three hours. i’m gonna start ignoring YOU when you talk about your interests and keep ranting about mine. if that’s how you’ve decided you’re going to treat me then i’m gonna do the same s*** right back until you realize that you’ve been doing this to me for weeks. then maybe we can talk this out like mature adults.

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My mother was a witch.

After she died, I went through an the boxes in the basement.

Found books of rituals and spells with dried candle wax melted all over them. Small dolls made of straw and scraps of fabric.

Many years earlier, before she died, my grandmother told me that my mother practiced witchcraft. My sister said it was the dementia taking, but I saw the look on my grandmother’s face. It was not dementia.