Head is spinning am so conflicted right now. Neighbor and I just had a repeat of outdoor morning wine and m*********** in my very private back yard. This time he placed chair facing me and we watched each other slowly stroke. He was gently verbally controlling me and was much more calm and relaxed than I was. When he saw me get close he would tell me to stop and then start again. I have never felt lole i am submissive but it felt like he had such power over me. He basically let me know it was time for me to c** by repeating from yesterday but this time when I spurted globs into his wine glass he put it to my face and told me to chug it instead of him chugging it lile yesterday morning. Then he began to m********* himself again as I watched. He repeated yesterday morning by asking me to stand before him and turn and let him