Numbers. F*k man. He stopped saying anything complimenting me at all 3 months ago. He stopped having me over 4 months ago. He started saying the same meaningless taboo nonsense over and over 4 months ago. I started referring to him as definitively just my friend 6 months ago. I stopped contacting him at all after his non-reply to my Christmas greeting 5 months ago. We stopped expecting that he was even going to be in my life 3 months ago. I started to believe those people who told me this is not a good man 2 weeks ago. I finally feel like I can let someone else in, knowing they will have to help me with this heartache 2 weeks ago. I told him I will obviously need to be seeing someone else 9 hours ago. I have not stopped crying for the last 1 1/2 hours ago. F*k me.