Every time it happens, I tell her I can’t help it. She always says, I know, it’s all right. Then she puts on this sad smile. Just before I finish, I ask her, can you forgive me for this mom? And she does, she forgives me every time I do it. Before it even happens. She knows what I’m going to do all over her. Like I said, she lets me anytime, I just have to ask. And play the little, I can’t help it mom game, of course. Then I say, thank you mommy. I’m breathless by then. I lean over her, and while she looks up at me it happens. As I finish, I thank her. Her sweater is soaked by the time I’m done. She tells me, you’re welcome and I tell her how good it felt, use a handful of her hair to clean myself, then, sometimes I do it again, just to see how sad it makes her. Before I leave, I ask, you’ll be here when I need it again, won’t you mom? She will say, yes honey.
