I had many bad dreams when I was a kid. To stop me from going to my parent’s room for comfort, my mom locked me in my room. She did this every night for a long time. The problem was sometimes I needed to go to the bathroom. I banged and screamed for my mom to let me out so I wouldn’t wet myself, but she never let me out. I didn’t want to wet myself, so I decided the only option I had was to pee in something in the room.

There was nothing suitable, so what I ended up doing was I opened the window and peed in the window sill. I figured the pee would go out the screen and get washed away by rain eventually.

I never banged on my door to be let out again after that. I learned that it was better to handle things myself than to hope my mother would help me. I learned to deal with my nightmares on my own. I relieved myself in the window many times before the door stopped being locked. I was just six years old at the time.

I don’t know if my mom ever realized what I did. She never mentioned it. We don’t talk anymore for many other reasons, and I’m fine keeping it that way. I remember being very young when I acknowledged I didn’t love her. I suspect she didn’t like me much either.