Hopefully spending most of the next 3 1/2 days with my married boyfriend’s c*** in my mouth and a**. The mere reference to him as a bf is a little unnerving for me. But as long as I am pretending to make myself feel better about the whole thing by venting pontlessly here….he wa knocking on my door an hour after seeing his wife off on her flight to go see her sister. Was stupidly happy to see him and wanted to drag him in and r*** him (or him me, technically). He had this grin that ran right through me and said he had hoped I would be waiting for him on my knees. Over detached b**** that I am despite not being a flamer, it sorta pissed me off and I told him that he needed to think with the other head for a minute. That got his attention. I did what I never wanted to do. Admitted this is getting attached for me. That long as he has known me he knows that this is totally not just s** for me. That I would never out him or be any risk to his marriage to her, and tbat as bad as I loathe being vulnerable, I needed him to have even a little respect for the frightening concept that I am getting attached, even if it is a false rush because he is just soooooo f****** incredible as a lover. He just looked at me for a moment and i was already hating myself for saying it out loud and also realizing “way to go, you just fucked up nearly four days of incredible s** for yourself.” He asked me what I needed and I was already shutting down and smart assed him with saying that I probably needed his c*** in my mouth so I could not talk and make it weird. He stood and asked me to stand and he stepped forward and pushed me back against the wall and leaned in and I was moaning around his tongue in my mouth. He raked his teeth against my throat and told me he knew what I needed and he would feed me his c*** later but we both knew it eas not what I needed at the moment. His hands went between my hips and my a** and I was already pushing forward against him and I felt him hard through our clothes and I was on fire instantly. I reached for his groin but he pushed my hands away and I whimpered please but he pinned ny hands to my hips. Told me not to dare move. I jumped out of my skin when his hand suddenly slid to my groin, he had never touched me there at all, and he cupped and squeezed aggressively and my c*** was instantly erect and I mentally lost my s*** trying desperately to paw at and touch and g**** him. But he told me not to move. That he knew what I needed and was going to give it I just needed to trust him. Like I had any mental energy to do otherwise. I have no idea how much time passed as this man took me to my own bed and played my body against me like a god. I was damn near sobbing with pleasure by the time he had me clinging to him as he fucked me slow and deep missionary and made me look up at him and he told me he was not going to c** in me until I came for him. I barely remember my eyes going wide and my body spasming as I shot off between us and my head turned to mush as he watched my face and said “that’s right baby c** for me” as I did exactly that. Come for him specifically. The only time I have even wanted, needed to c** for any man. He ran his hand down and put a wet finger in my mouth and I sucked my own c** off it as if it were a c***. Then he told to hold on tightly because he needed to c** in me. My god he fucked me right through my own mattress and begging for more and then I was in full bore tears as he tensed and let go in me, his voice broke when he just keep saying how much he loved f****** me over and over as he came. He was exhausted and took me under his arm as he fell asleep with me gently fondling his balls. I dozed but woke up because my head is just too busy to sleep. I am about to wake him up and feed him and take him to the shower and make him want to leave his wife for me. Not really but don’t i wish. I know this whole thing is going to destroy me but f*** me I am delirously happy just now.