The only reason I’m still alive is because I promised my best friend and my mother that I wouldn’t kill myself. Otherwise, I had already planned to kill myself on my birthday this year. The world has left me behind. Romance has forsaken me, left me deaf and dumb and deprived. I am a useless, defective human being. I’m so tired but they won’t let me quit. I just want to sleep. That’s why I’m like thi. I just want to jump in the Connecticut river and smash my head on the rocks and die instantly
I may have a pulse but I’ve been dead for years. I will not die of natural causes. Im not going to grow old alone and socially maladapted, I refuse. It’s too late to fix this. The rust has eaten through my bones. Ive gone feral.
