To: Scared of him in a way . I love u. But I’m not sure of u . I feel like running away . Big steps
Me: I understand your confusion, but especially the “he move in with you bit”. You really don’t want him moving in and taking over your home or your life.
Rent a spare room to him. Make him your tenant, keep his clothes in his own room, share your bed with him as you might. Charge him a percentage of your charges to keep your home, maybe 50% and charge him for extras, extra – Electricity, Gas, Running Costs and so on – as part and parcel of your expenses.
Have him sign an agreement to paying the rent agreed, plus expenses you have agreed to and send a copy to the Income Tax man, as proof of income and to keep everything neat and above board, bearing in mind that your expenses are not taxable, because those are expenses you have to pay out, to earn your income, or his rent, which is.
Keep that signed document in a safe place, maybe at a Bank, where they keep it under lock and key, one of the customer services they provide.
He is renting a room from you and is your tenant, so while he lives with you and you do whatever you do together, he is only there legally for as long as you want him to be and if he ever moves out, he is not entitled to anything you own, provided you never allow him to buy anything with you – which could be considered a shared asset.
When you get married, he might gain 50% of your assets, but you will have to check that out and decide if that is what you want to do.
I have been doing the above for the past 8 years and I have moved on 2 housemates who I rented rooms to, who moved out with what they brought into my home, without having any legal access to anything of mine.
It works just fine and I recommend this technique to anyone who wants to live with their s***** partner, or just someone to fill up the lonely times, but there are assets to be considered, as well.
If he won’t agree to a rental from you, then you really do not want to be with this person and you rightly should give him the bullet and go and find someone who does agree to this arrangement, instead.
I’m here if you have any questions – just ask me.
This was legal advice I got from a Lawyer and paid for.
R