To: I’ve been slowly trying to distance myself from a very bad romantic connection,
Me: Block him on all of your social media and don’t respond to anything he might say, on there, about you.
If you neither confirm or deny, then nobody will be able to confirm that anything he said about you was true and it will eventually backfire on him.
Any relationship end up, always hurts, whether that’s a marriage, or anything else and it takes time to heal, so set yourself 6 months minimum, to get over him before you start looking around again and expect to have those negative moments and crying a lot, because that is normal and the way we get rid of those memories or emotions that caused us so much grief.
Most importantly of all, is for you not to get involved with someone else on the rebound, when you are vulnerable, as that, more often than not, is even worse than what you just got out of.
You could open a private file, password protected to just you and pour out everything which is causing you emotional issues now – use it as your confessor, read it through and keep adding more stuff out of your memory, over an unlimited amount of time and one day you will wake up refreshed and completely empty of all the emotions which caused you so much pain and then you can permanently delete that file and tell yourself, at the same time, that the past is finished and you are now ready to move into another relationship.
Learn from your mistakes from the last relationship, how he treated you and where it went off the rails and then make up a list of the ideal man for you and look for that person on social media and let him hang himself, or prove to you, he could be the one, before you let him get close.
You can also check out his name and address on social media, make sure he is not a Catfish and if there are good raves about him and if he won’t connect with you face to face, contact Neve on Catfish in America to check him out for you and make sure he is who he says he is, if you don’t know him from your past.
Finally getting into relationship and out of them is the way we learn the techniques of selling ourselves and how to handle emotional situations which we were never taught how to manage.
I would suggest, next time around you find someone with secure employment, earning a good income, who is not mean with it and who wants a permanent relationship, a home and kids, assuming you want them too. Normally I would suggest someone who has completed an apprenticeship in a particular trade where there is a constant demand for his skills…….or someone from a wealthy family, which accepts you and takes you into their midst.
Good Luck!!