• 2 weeks ago
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im freaking out.
today my mom just mentioned that i have to start going to sleep at a more regular time.
i have started staying up late and going to sleep at like 8AM and then waking up at 4PM.
She mentioned that I either have to get a job here or move back to Sweden and start taking courses and get a job.. Just her mentioning it made me freeze and just panic.
I started looking up online courses that I might try to get a better chance of getting a job, but every single one that I saw looked waaay too advanced for me so I started googeling reading about other people who might have the same problem as me.
i have been living with my parents for almost 5 years now im almost 24 and i have never gotten a job and i failed high school so if i want to go to college i have to take some classes first. oh and did i mention that im f**king autistic too. yeah the total trainwreck package.
now im crying because i feel stupid (and lazy) and all because i have wasted 5 years almost 6 and now i don’t know what to do..

my best friend is also autistic but he’s a security guard and i live next to a farm, about and 2 hours away from the city with no driver’s license and no car..

i feel like i need to talk to my mom about this but i have no idea what she would say or even want me to do. and im scared of living on my own, but i know thats what i need to do!
i cant live like this anymore. its killing me.

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