Im so confuse rn. I really wanted to cry because I cant explain things. I really don’t know what to do. I honestly dont want him to go (it’s as if there’s something but there’s nothing, too). Wtf is happening to me.it sounded so selfish and sad. I dont want to ruin anyone especially that I dont want to ruin him in any way. I really do want him to be happy but i feel like im doing something wrong ( I feel so lost and I just want to find a refuge or something like )
Now dont get me wrong, Im still gonna be myself. But somethings telling me somethings not right. I usually am not really Vocal about things like this in public and usually dont vent this long unless its to my bestfriend. Like Im afraid If I continue doing things that I love, I would just end up hurting myself and him. If I put on expectations, I would just end up getting hurt. If I literally do anything, i will be an emotional mess. There’s many questions running Inside my head. However i dont know. Im just gonna distract myself from this i guess. Why am I finding myself in this predicament anyway? Ill just shrug this off ugh.
