Almost twenty years ago I was spitroasted by The Family Man and The Family Boy from Family Auto Mart, with the Appliance Direct guy stroking and glazing me down. The Family Boy hollered out WE’RE GREAZING ANNNNNNDDDDD SLLLLLEEEAAAZZZIIINNNGGG and then the korean guy said SEE IT FIRST and he took a picture right at the moment Man creamed and Boy covered my face. Appliance Direct guy wiped all the c** off of me and then floor with a rag, then said Open Drum No Agitator as he shoved the dirty cumrag in my mouth and made me lick it clean. Ahh, the old days in Orlando.

– KORVALLUS KRINGLE