You wipe your b*** with your bare hand, but consider bacon unclean.
You may be a Muslim.

You consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in your clothing.
You may be a Muslim.

You were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs.
You may be a Muslim.

You refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to liquor.
You may be a Muslim.

You find this offensive or racist and don’t forward it.
You may be a Muslim.