There’s a family party coming up this weekend and my relatives trigger my social anxiety so much that I’m sitting here thinking about the gathering and I’m about to have diarrhea from stress. I kind of want to go just to prove I can do it and these stupid fears can’t get to me but I dread having to meet those people, answering their stupid questions and taking their degrading s*** treating me as if I was still 15. I’m so torn,I want to go but I don’t want to go.