I regret not paying more attention or being more attentive. He was a childhood friend. He and I had not talked for years when he suddenly reach out to me through social media. We sent a few messages back and fourth and he asked to hang out – I.. am constantly working and I regularly have guys ask me out so I gave him a soft close that went something along the lines of ‘yeah we should! as soon as I get some free time’ Remember my workload is always heavy. I run two businesses, am a landlord with properties to manage and it just feels like I always have something to take care of. . .
I wish I slowed down at that time. I wish I took his words to heart and made time.
Why did I not realize that he was telling me he was sick. …Very sick. That’s why he was telling me secrets in those messages. That’s why he reached out. That’s why he wanted to see me. He was trying to tell me that he was dying… He died a few days after that.
I hate when my friends die on me. Maybe .. maybe I really am selfish. I thought I had the patience of a saint, I feel like I’m good to others. But I will admit that I never give anyone my time of day unless.. I gain something from it. I need to re-evaluate a few things. Today is his birthday – Happy heavenly birthday