my first crush just got a girlfriend today. long story short me and him has quickly became close since day 1, everything went well and we always flirted with each other, we acted like we were more than just friends even though we claim that were just friends. we talked every single day for hours, we called for around 10 hours every single day, we would always be with each other no matter what we were doing. we played games together, watched videos together, we did soo many things with each other untilllll he got closer to this girl in the same e-sports team as him. so fyi ive always loved him and it did feel like he loved me too but i always felt like im not enough for him because a guy like him can easily be liked by many other girls and maybe even girls better than myself:’). but this girl and him i think got close to each other pretty quickly as well and they’re in the same e-sports team, they play the same games, and he thinks she’s really pretty. one time he put out an instagram story and someone asked him to tag a girl he thinks is pretty and he tagged her and only her. ever since then weve been spending less time with each other, he isnt like how he used to be. we still texted and called at that time just less but to be honest he was still flirting with me until yesterday so i was always confused. today, he barely texted me. i texted him in the afternoon today and he never replied, i was confused ofc cause i know him and hes free most of the time. but i just let him be and assumed he was busy with e-sports, then i was curious so i went to check on the game he played for the e-sports and i came across a feature in the game which lets you show who your friends, lover, and bffs are. i checked his and that girl was the lover:(. meanwhile i was no where.. the moment i saw that i felt a stab to my heart. i was frozen. literally. i dropped my phone and my head just dropped to my desk. my whole body became cold i honestly just wanna sleep for a long time rn. and then after a while i texted him i asked him if he got a girlfriend recently and i congratulated him ofc:). until now he hasnt replied even though i can see him online.. but its whatever i guess. i just hope we continue being friends at least cause im just not ready to fully let go of him. even though i may not be the one for him and this really hurt me i still wanna be there to support him when he needs it because hes my first crush and hes always made me really happy everyday and he was always there when im lonely so i hope we can still be friends reagan<3 you're with someone else and i respect that. i will keep my distance but just thank you for all the happy memories we made together, reagan:).
