I watched my childhood dog bleed to death on our driveway. She didn’t see my mum’s car coming. It’s been 2 years, and I still think about her everyday. I still replay feeling the car hit something while in the passenger’s seat. I still remember the pool of blood that stained the driveway. I still remember sitting with her dead body in front of me for hours waiting for a man to come take her to some dog morgue. What’s worst is that I could feel something bad was going to happen that day. And when our gate opened, and my mother drove in, I saw my dog was tired and didn’t walk as fast as she usually did to get out of the way. Something was just different. Maybe it was a combination of me not thinking much of it or everything happening too fast for me to register. For the longest time I felt like I could have done something. Now the event just haunts me. I remember every single detail. It’s so painful to remember. I miss my baby. It hurts so much to see photos of her, to talk about dogs or pets or driveways. I feel helpless. I wish it never happened. I wish I could forget.
