I had to put down my second oldest dog yesterday. She was 14, almost 15. I stayed with her the entire time, and held her close until the very end. I cried

6 years

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I had to put down my second oldest dog yesterday. She was 14, almost 15. I stayed with her the entire time, and held her close until the very end. I cried so hard, and for so long as I watched her go. And it hurts even more, simply because she was fine just days earlier.

And I hate myself, too. I let it happen, she was filthy and flea ridden. I am a horrific owner, and I hate myself for it. And since we’ve gotten home, I haven’t felt- Anything.
I think about her a lot, and sometimes I get a little teary eyed, but I haven’t cried, not like yesterday. And its starting to worry me a lot, because I f****** loved that dog. She’s been in my life for more than half of it. And I keep seeing her, or hearing her. Or I’ll be talking to my Mom or the other dogs, and I’ll say her name and immediately feel like such a f****** douchebag and terrible human.

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