My one friend that I’ve known my entire life really knows nothing about me, she likes to think she does and whenever I vent my problems to her she’s always trying to impose her opinions on me and wants me to live a life exactly like hers and her cocaine addicted boyfriend.
She lives paycheck to paycheck trying to get by as a starving artist with No GED or education whatsoever and from what shes told me her and her boyfriend have cheated on each other multiple times and so she basically has No room to be giving me advice.
Sure my boyfriend and I aren’t perfect but NO ONE is perfect he is a great man, he is stoic and patient and kind. He is also smart, calculated, educated and very important to me and I have invested a lot into him, being married/ in a relationship with someone is one of the most complicated relationships you can have and just because I told her he wasn’t pleasing me in bed at that moment doesn’t mean I’m going to throw away our entire relationship like f***. We have amazing s**.
But I’m not going around bragging about how good my boyfriend fucks me.
Another thing that bothers me is that She’s all about tarot cards and astrology and birth charts and b*******, I’ve tried to have conversations with her about how I feel and what I believe and my spirituality but she gets literally MAD and can’t listen to someone having an opinion other than hers..
She constantly talks s*** about all of her other friends and then COMPLAINS about how they’re all wanna be like posers that are trying to be her and God I know that sounds so high school but that is literally how she is.
It is obvious that she only cares about her own opinions and only wants to hear about the problems we have bc she literally never responds to me other wise…. it’s really annoying.
People fight , have to go through things to get to the other side. It’s just frustrating when someone you’ve known since you were two constantly tries to tell you how wrong your boyfriend is for you when she doesn’t even know him or try to.
I lowkey think shes racist, she always was when we were growing up and I’m white but my boyfriend is black and he’s 8 years older than me and we started dating when I was 16 but her boyfriend and her have the same age gap and their situation is so unsustainable in five years I’ll be owning my own house and she’ll be working at the same warehouse job trying to get by.
I hate to say it and I hope she can make something of her life but I’m just not interested in any advice she has to give me bc she could never even BEGIN to understand the pain I went through in my childhood, she like everyone else has abandoned me and she’s a horrible friend and only wants to insert herself in my life to tell me how to live like just f*** off just listen to my problems and trust that I can handle my own judgment because I’ve done a damn good job of it so far.
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You’re constantly judging her and you don’t seem to like anything about her. Just sever the relationship so you both have the time and resources to develop real friendships.
It’s less judgment and more just stating the facts.
I never said I didn’t like anything about her but I do think you’re right maybe my relationship with her would be better of severed at this point, I’m not sure.
I also think that just because people have differing opinions doesn’t mean they can’t find middle ground.
I think people need to have more conversations with those whom they do not agree with.
People need to be more open to accepting those who live opposedly. And I do not oppose her life style I just don’t think that where she’s coming from that she has any right to give me advice about mine.
I just wish I could get through to her with this without sounding like an asshole but I sound like an asshole and that’s a bit unavoidable.
Consider whether you’ve known her so long she’s become more of a habit than a friend. Habits are hard to break even when they’re not especially good for you.
This started off sounding so much like this girl I used to be friends with that I thought you were her. She still hasn’t cut off her “best friend” as far as I’m aware even though I tried to convince her to. It’s hard but I hope you figure things out.
I think there are a lot of people in this world like her, maybe the fact that we recognize it makes it our responsibility to help them change or just help them come to a different understanding.
I have love for her, I recognize her struggles and her attributes but I sometimes wish things were different.
It’s hard for me to give up on people because I’ve seen a lot of true evil and true hatred and I know that this is not that.
But yeah I really need to get out there more and meet some new people within my own field I guess, maybe that would help.
Thanks for your comment.