Got a cat from an animal shelter 2 months ago, they called me to say the cats owners had come forward and they want it back. I don’t think so. The cat and I have formed an emotional bond. How dare the shelter ask this, once the cat has a new home that’s it end of. Get yourself a new cat because it’s mine now.
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This pussy is your.
Tell them fuck you, we ate that cat.
Find a dead cat in a gutter somewhere, put it in a box and give it to them.
Adopt a cat from a different shelter and give it to them.
Put a brick in a box, and give it to them. Add a note that says “Fuck you, my cat now”.
Send photos of cat being held over a pot of boiling water, demand ransom.
Shove an IED up the cat’s ass, return it, run.