I am 9 months pregnant now. I had a love marriage. I married after 6 months of my completing Engineering. My parents were strictly against this marriage. They had been abusive to me, they did not want a daughter. They hated me, insulted me, tortured me and even tried to kill me jokingly. All these forced me to get out of that house; which I did.
I married my long term boyfriend. His family helped us to get married.
Today, I am just a few weeks behind my delivery date. I can’t work for the next 1 or who knows how many years. I can’t leave my child like that; unattended.
My husband is a self occupied man. He is not a family man. I am slowly drafting away from him. He has changed for wrong reasons. I don’t think my marriage will last longer, if this doesn’t stop.
I will most probably leave him and settle somewhere else.
He was already married, before he met me and till date he has not filed even for an ex parte. I should have backed out then and there only.
Now, he’s comfortable with having no family time. Even on weekends, he doesn’t talk much to me. I should have taken this as a signal and should have not married him.
He just wanted a place in this society to survive. On the name of marriage and family he has played good with my emotions and life.
I have felt lonely and I am afraid if I will make a wrong decision now. I never wanted such a husband. I always thought that after surviving a bad childhood, I will have a happy marriage.
He’s so busy in himself that he doesn’t give a f*** about my emotional state. My friends think that I am lucky, but they don’t know how broken I am. I have hit a dead end now. I have lost strength to hold my broken self together.
I might try to kill myself after the baby is born.
