I just read about a young man from England on here that’s gay and tired…so I want to add to the rant, you see I’m 45 I’m and American and proud, But I have been addicted to p*** for about 38 years and can’t stop I have tried so hard and then I run around and act normal all day and act like nothings wrong…I have been married for 29 years this year and my wife gets no attention from me cause I find my satisfaction in p***…I started with p*** and it takes me places I don’t want to go but like a robot…i trudge on…with no hope in sight..I was molested by my mom my grandfather and seen my grandmother naked on a regular basis..I jacked grown men off when I was very young…say about 2-3 I have memories while in short flashes I have them I know what was done to me…I was molested by my brother as well….and all that I’ve been through has totally wrecked me and who knows what I could have become if I hadn’t been put through the s*** I went through…I work in a factory I have 2 grown daughters and each day I look at p*** and all this has made it impossible to show a normal family what a dad should look like…they see the mask they have never met their real dad cause I have never wanted them to see the real me and who I am…I contemplate suicide each day…just to scared to go through with it…I am a believer in Jesus but I am a doubter as well…everyone says oh call out his name and confess you are a sinner and he will forgive…yes he forgives but I never will..I hate my existence. MY MOM PASSED AWAY n 2020/September 14th and my dad has been dead since I was 8 he never gave a f*** about me, it was always the heroin he cared about and the b**** he was f****** at the time…he went to a Christmas party with her and I never seen him again…and I hope that b**** died as well…nope that isn’t cool but that’s just how I feel…I don’t know what a day is like without jacking off to a digital woman I can’t even feel touch or smell…my wife has all but given up on me she don’t even try to look attractive anymore nothing like she used to do…I remember she could drive me crazy in those days even with a p*** addiction she didn’t know I had….I have also thought a lot about being gay but I don’t believe that is right for me…I just love women! But still my head is. Wreck I have depression issues I’m super f****** mad all the time and I hate people…I haven’t met a true friend ever in my entire life that’s given a shot enough about me to try and even send a text now and then just to stay in contact….ok I’m done let all who gonna hate do their thing…cause it’s nothing new in this pos world we live in..cheers