this counts as a lie and guilt.

when i was 13, mid breakdown, i lied to my mom about being SA’d when it only just *nearly* happened. it did not actually happen to me back then but i said that anyways.

im 16 now.
i regret it so much. i feel so disgusting for ever saying that and not being truthful. we never went to court for it, but she said that if she ever knew i was lying, she’d kick me out of her house for good (which i understand). but i want to come clean but im not sure what to do. i feel so awful for lying about something that can be life shattering for others, something unforgivable and painful. i need to come clean and its the right thing to do regardless. but i cant support myself right now financially. what should i do?..