“Im not that innocent anymore.” God, I havent even touched myself. People my age have gone through that h**** all the time phase ages ago, exploring themselves and letting other people explore them, too. I dont even look down at my body that much! I get under the shower, clean myself, and thats that. Well, Im living without any s***** action so in my opinion, its not that important. Recently, though, everyone seems to have been touched by someone now and Ive got to stay relevant. I remember playing with my vaggy the same age I was playing with my veggies, I was maybe 6 or 5. Then a friend of mine would come over, a year younger than me, then wed play vegetable wars. My soldier was a cabbage and his was a carrot. I didnt think of it as anything else but a game! No one f****** told me theyre used for s** and I just had to learn about that when I was in fourth grade and the boys were talking about their pricks. I never had the ‘talk’. I just assumed that babies sprouted out of the ground in the middle of a pineapple garden. So there it is, Im a loser but maybe Im not because I havent lost anything yet. Ive got no s** life and my t*** are as fresh as the prince of bel-air.