At work I was asked to go to the charge desk and check in with the charge nurse before I leave and I neglected to do so and I was prideful lazy immature

10 months

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At work I was asked to go to the charge desk and check in with the charge nurse before I leave and I neglected to do so and I was prideful lazy immature unprofessional ungodly ungrateful irresponsible self righteous selfish impatient I lied I was hypocritical disrespectful ungrateful unloving unmerciful unforgiving unfaithful self righteous neglectful and I had resentment worldly sorrow I was manipulative divisive and I had a martyr like attitude

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I was the one who drank my brothers mt dew that he left in the fridge, he blamed my younger brother and I got away with it

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Everyday I feel more and more severely depressed at the fact that I have failed to kill myself several times i just want to be happy and forget about everything I keep repeating my destructive desires one more painful lesson and I will just end it