We started dating this year, right before I turned 20, but I didn't get her age right. I thought she was 18 turning 19 this year, but, as it turned out,

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We started dating this year, right before I turned 20, but I didn’t get her age right. I thought she was 18 turning 19 this year, but, as it turned out, she is 17. Now, please understand that the age gap made me very anxious, but I was too scared to break her heart right at the start of our relationship, so I followed through. She told her family about us, which was surprising since you’d usually wait for a bit of time before doing so, and they were okay with it. In fact, they love me. Similarly, I had to tell mine, because they saw how anxious I was every day, and all they said was to be careful.

The real issue starts here: I wasn’t careful. That girl is the horniest person that I have met my whole life, and from the start of our relationship, she has not stopped talking about her s***** fantasies and how she wants me. Still, we both made it clear that nothing would happen until she turned 18, but even that felt off to me. My brother said I was pre-ordering, which sounds messed up, but that’s his humour. Well, the more I was being tempted, the harder it was to resist, and before I could even realise it, I had pulled down my pants and she had grabbed my p****. That was mostly it on that day. She just grabbed it. A few weeks later, she was already grinding on my s**, fortunately with her clothes on, and I still couldn’t stop it. Here comes the worst. Right after grinding on me, she sat between my legs, and I couldn’t help but slip my hand in her p****** and rub her p****. She didn’t stop me. In fact, she was enjoying it, until she got a bit hurt and I immediately got a wakeup call. I told her it was enough since we had never done that before. I felt so grossed out by what I had done.

I’m not looking for pity. I have never hated myself that much before and I think I deserve it. I just had to get it off my chest. Earlier today, I told her how our relationship makes me anxious, and that I don’t think she’s mature enough for us to be doing this. From the way she responded, I’m guessing this story won’t end well. I shouldn’t be making excuses, but I haven’t fallen that hard for someone in 2 years after my last relationship. Part of me felt compelled to go along with her s***** tendencies, but, obviously, the other part of me was simply overcome by the worst vice of them all. I’m sorry Mom and Dad. I’m just gross.

New Confession

I hope you find inner peace guy/girl with the therapist.
I wouldn’t put your stocks on them breaking up for your happiness, tho.
Sounds like you need to find someone who isn’t helping you through mental wars.
I heard it’s common to fall for a therapist because they listen.
Maybe that’s why I used to be obsessed with my friends. 🤷‍♂️
Just some food for thought. And on that note, I’m excited and nervous to meet my first therapist in June.
(Being sober is helping, too)

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My Grandpa asked me to help him relax. He took his robe off and was naked. He said he was going to leave me a lot of money when he was gone and needed me to help him relieve stress.

He ask me to stroke his thing. It was big and hard, and he insisted. I love him, and wanted to help but knew this should not be happening. But, I did it anyway. I knelt down in front of him and started playing with it and stroking it for him. He said I was a good girl for helping him and would be rewarded, but it had to be our secret.

He moved closer to my face and asked me to lick it, and put it in my mouth. I never did this before and told him I never did that, and he said that’s OK he would show me what to do. He was pumping away in and out of my mouth and moaning and telling me what a good girl I was to help him out. A minute or two later he was making a mess in my mouth and some of it on my face and clothes. I was disgusted and it tasted bad.

He pulled me up and hugged me. His hands running all over my body and touching me in places he should not have touched me. He even pulled my undies to the side and touched my private place, and commented how wet I was down there. He said you must have liked it and been a little excited to do that for me.

I am quite sure by his comments he intends for me to do this again for him. I got a weird feeling he wants me to do more than we did today… not sure if I can do that with him because I have not done that with my BF even so far.