I harassed a girl in HS and it haunts me everyday.

In high school I(m17 at the time) smoked weed after school with a girl(f18) in a stairway of her apartment. After smoking I got high and tried to kiss the girl. We had kissed before, but she did not want to kiss me. She told me no. I would stop and try again and misread the situation. I felt that, in my impaired state I was misreading the situation as though it was okay and they were both on the same page.

It doesn’t make it right and I was in the wrong. I realize that.

Eventually I got up to leave and we hugged. I touched her b*** and while she didn’t stop me, in retrospect I regret doing that. I felt in the moment that persisting was the right thing, but after sobering up I realized I had acted in a way I extremely regretted. The girl text me and told me I made her uncomfortable. I quickly apologized. She said it was okay. She later told all of our mutual friends. At first our friends distanced themselves from me and later one of them spoke to me. I told them what happened and the friend said “sometimes you can’t avoid making someone uncomfortable”. I called the other mutual friends to tell them what happened without blaming the girl or lying or making excuses. The girl forgave me and by the end of the school year we were all cool and took pictures together. The friends came to forgive me as well . The girl unfollowed me on instagram recently.

As more times passes I grown more embarrassed and regretful as that day replays in my head. I did something that I can’t take back and it’s eating me up inside. I’ve spent so much time online looking for answers, trying to understand what I did and the weight of it. I think about how disgusted the people in my life would be if they knew. I wonder how often the girl thinks about that day. How it affected her.