I slipped again, I think this is just something I need to accept as a flaw and manage the best I can. I wrapped a rake handle with plastic and spit all over it and backed into it. I immediately squirted s**** and prostate fluid out. I just had to have my fix and was circling the drain for days. It’s so ironic but yesterday I was just thinking how far I’ve come with my addiction. So much for that. I’m sorry but I don’t blame myself for my broken condition. Hoping this is the last time. Amen