I lie. To my parents, my partner, my roommate, my former employers, any friends I’ve ever had. Not a single soul on this Earth knows the real me and it’s slowly crushing me to death. I don’t think I can repair the damage I’ve done, the trust I’ve broken and misplaced. The face the world sees is nothing but a mask that is only one misplaced word from slipping away and showing the truth underneath. I am so tired of being alone. I am so tired of fighting. I am so tired of hiding. I am so tired of hurting. I want so desperately to let it all go but I know that when I do my life will collapse. And as much as I hate myself, I don’t want to die. I want the impossible; I want to admit my falseness.. and then I want everyone to move on like nothing happened.
