I’m ashamed of being so obsessive and jealous over everyone I love. And I mean EVERYONE I love, not the casual friend or “bed partner” I mean every friend I’ve kept in my life. I want to cry every time I hear they hung out with someone new that I don’t know because what if they get hurt? For my best friends it’s even worse, because we’re all very lovey and comfortable. I call them nicknames and I do special thing with each friend- but what if they allow someone else to use MY nickname for them or they do OUR thing with someone else. My brain gets so f****** fuzzy, I get really upset to the point I have to shut myself off so I don’t threaten someone or beg for them to never do that again. It’s… something else. I don’t like it. I hope they never find out.