i love my friend so much and i feel as though sometimes i shouldn’t care for him nearly as much as i should. every time i see him going through a hard time, all i want to do is run over and hug him and tell him that it’s all gonna be okay and that i will always be here for him, i want to hold his face in my hands and see him smile, i want to hold him and watch youtube with him like he does so much until we both drift off to sleep. i cling to him like glue and all i want is to see him happy, but i know how bad his mental health is, and how bad mine is, and that i can’t always help and it hurts so much. i want to help him. i want to make him happy, i want him to feel like everything is going to be okay and it makes me feel terrible that i can’t do that. i know that’s not my fault. i know that will never be my fault. but f*** i feel bad that i cant do /something/ for him like i used to be able to with anyone, really.
