When my husband was driving home in an ice storm alone I entertained the thought of him crashing. I would actually be relieved if he died. We have

5 years

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When my husband was driving home in an ice storm alone I entertained the thought of him crashing. I would actually be relieved if he died. We have children together and I feel trapped.

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Yesterday I once again went looking for p********** online. And I saw the most evil type of p********** there is. I don’t understand why I went looking for it. Nothing I see turns me on. I kept playing with my p**** as I clicked on images. Nothing I saw was s******* arousing but I played with myself anyway. I didn’t have a hard-on or anything. I finally came with a soft d***. Simply because I was playing with it. Not because of anything I saw online. I went to some chat rooms and I said some things that were evil too. And they certainly weren’t true! Just sick fantasy!
I have no idea why I chose to do it. But I have to stop doing it ever again! Please pray for me!!!