When I was 16, I briefly dated a 13-year-old boy online, and I really regret it. A LOT.
As an adult, I know that it’s unusual for a 16-year-old and a 13-year-old to date, but I didn’t know that when I was a 16. I’d never been in a relationship before that, so I wasn’t really aware of the rules around dating as a teenager. I’d like to add that it was all online, so there was no physical contact between us. We did exchange some… not really “nudes”, but some very suggestive images of each other, but that was all completely consensual. I never coerced him into sending something he didn’t want to send, and I never sent something if I felt it would make him uncomfortable.
It’s not like I purposefully pursued a relationship with a younger boy; When we first started talking we were just friends, and I had no intention of dating him. I only started dating him because I had a feeling he had a crush on me, and I didn’t want to hurt his feelings by turning him down. So I lied and told him I liked him, which was a s***** thing to do in hindsight. After about like 3 – 4 weeks of dating him, I realized that I made a mistake and I decided to break up with him, not just because of the age gap but also because I didn’t want to keep dating someone that I didn’t love.
It was an important lesson for me to learn, and I learned it the hard way.
We’re still friends today, and I have apologized to him multiple times. And each time he told me that it’s ok, that he wasn’t harmed by my actions, and that I shouldn’t beat myself up over it. Though I still feel kinda guilty about it.
To sum it up: I briefly dated a 13-year-old online when I was 16, we exchanged some lewd photos but it was all consensual. I made a mistake and I learned from it, but thinking about it still makes me cringe.