• 2 weeks ago
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I am still in love with my Ex husband, even after a year of not seeing or speaking to him. Last night I messaged him and confessed these feelings, knowing he is in a new relationship. He confessed that he still loves me too. We talked for hours and he ended up coming to see me. I feel horrible because we slept together, and it was both the best and worst night of my life. I have been in physical heart ache over him since the last day I saw him. I was the one who hurt him, and now that I am getting the mental help I need for my BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder), he says there might be a chance for us, if I keep improving myself. But he also doesn’t know what he is going to do. He still has a girlfriend who lives with him. He says he is not happy with her, but he can’t say whether they will continue to be together and try to work through things, or if he is going to leave her. I understand all of it, the fear, worry, and not being able to promise anything, because you can’t know until the time comes. Especially after I had hurt him. But it still hurts me, and my pain has been worse since he left this morning. I don’t know if I can handle waiting for him, or if I will be able to move on. I fear if heart break does not kill me first, I may end up killing myself because I just can’t keep going on like this.

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