My sister is sick. She is in a lot of pain. And she has to take naps almost everyday. She lives with her fiancé and his family. She's also only 19. I'm 23

6 years

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My sister is sick. She is in a lot of pain. And she has to take naps almost everyday. She lives with her fiancé and his family. She’s also only 19.

I’m 23 and I still live with my parents. Compared to her, and her life, I feel like a loser.

The thing is: If she died… I don’t know if I would sad or not. I would miss her. At least a little. But that’s about it.

There’s not a lot of people that I have in my life that I would miss if they died. I know that now. I would mostly just be a little bothered by the fact that they died. And then get on with my day.

New Confession

today has been an awful day. I won’t go into the full specifics but I feel like a failure for the actions of others and how they harmed me professionally and mentally. It came to a head when an act of kindness from one person nearly became a guilt they would carry. a lady stopped so I could cross the road. she had the right of way and didn’t have to stop. but she did. the person behind her whipped onto the shoulder of the road and around her nearly hitting me. had I walked faster, had i not been watching one persons act of kindness would have been a guilt that weighed on them. The worst part is I am not sure if am upset at the impatience of the person who nearly hit me, or disappointed I didn’t move faster.

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