I am terrible with maintaining interpersonal relationships. I dont have any disorders aside from ADHD, and everything online points to personality

7 years

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I am terrible with maintaining interpersonal relationships. I dont have any disorders aside from ADHD, and everything online points to personality disorders. I find it difficult to text people often. Ive almost lost my best friend when I left for a far away college becayse I would be lacking I’m texting. Its not that I dont care because I do. Ill see them text me and just put my phone down and think that ipl get back to it later and then I wont feel motivation to respond. This makes me think that maybe I’m just a terrible person. Why am I so bad with communicating. What is wrong with me? I could love someone to death, but not text them often enough. Does anyone have an answer. It could be llayed off as low maintenance, but I think a part of me still despised that in like this. What is wrong with me?

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I can’t stop coming home from work and jerking off to i***** p***

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I used to go online, find girls to have online relations with. I was a teenager. It started from the start of high school, when I was 15. At worst was F, that was my bottom barrel. It was gross. I don’t know how old she was but she was younger. It was near the end, during the pandemic. I was older, she was younger. I don’t know how much younger, but I was 16 I think. She was younger. Like 2 or 3 years younger, I dunno? It was gross of me. I regret doing it but I fear my regret isn’t because of how I hurt someone, took advantage. They were ok with it in the moment, we were both on the same hookup site. But I was gross. No question about it. There was T too but that was a 16-18 age gap. I deleted the accounts. I was just gross.