I always tell myself I won't say 'i love you' to anyone and hold it in. I won't make promises of marrying the girl. I would avoid to be utterly romantic

7 years

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I always tell myself I won’t say ‘i love you’ to anyone and hold it in. I won’t make promises of marrying the girl. I would avoid to be utterly romantic which I am as a pisces. But I end up following the same script. And eventually the girl stops feelings the attraction. It makes me sad. I know that for girls it’s only interesting as long as they are chasing you, and the moment you start giving more than they are giving; they start to look for another quest. I don’t know when I will change my behavior. can you please stop this ? can you stop please stop telling people that you love them. for godsake please stop or you will be alone all your life.

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I used to go online, find girls to have online relations with. I was a teenager. It started from the start of high school, when I was 15. At worst was F, that was my bottom barrel. It was gross. I don’t know how old she was but she was younger. It was near the end, during the pandemic. I was older, she was younger. I don’t know how much younger, but I was 16 I think. She was younger. Like 2 or 3 years younger, I dunno? It was gross of me. I regret doing it but I fear my regret isn’t because of how I hurt someone, took advantage. They were ok with it in the moment, we were both on the same hookup site. But I was gross. No question about it. There was T too but that was a 16-18 age gap. I deleted the accounts. I was just gross.