I was s******* active with my first girlfriend 8.5 year prior. It took the death of a friend my age to shake me enough into repentance and breaking off that unholy relationship.

Over the next 8 years I thought I was leaving my s***** activity behind me until I was married to my wife, and was very much so while dating various girls.

A half year ago my newest girlfriend and I were falling deeply in love. We starting things off right, no s***** contact and building our emotional and spiritual connection without any pressure to dive into the physical aspects that most of our culture makes relationships about.

She is a very active believer serving in many areas of her church. She is also a very curious person and also a virgin, so eventually after a period of spiritual weakness (Lack of personal commitment prayerfully and scripturally in my life), I allowed her to touch me in intimate places. Over the next few months this lead to further exploration to the point where it was starting to spiral out of control and basically doing everything that was not technically s***** penetration. We were trying to get away with acting on our lust while still being able to claim we were saving s** for marriage. This entire time I would feel convicted as things were getting heated but too weak and lustful to act upon this prompting.

Then God came knocking at my door with a wake up call. Boom. Conviction that I cannot ignore, guilt, shame…. Especially in the aspect that I was ignoring the clear warnings from God to stop and steer clear. This is all healthy as it will lead to repentance, so that we can truly live in forgiveness.

We both have renewed our commitment to be fully pure, but I fear that I will forget the lessons I’ve learned once again, and ignore the conviction that steers from sinful acts.

I earnestly ask for your prayers for not just the two of us, but for the other people who have posted. It is very difficult to honor God with our bodies in this hypersexualized culture, but honoring God is my number one priority.

Flee s***** immorality as talked about in 1 Cor 6.