Psychologist (clinical) by profession. Tried to kill myself 4 times already over the course of my life. I am in my 20s. Actually, early 20s. Abused,

8 years

520 Views

Psychologist (clinical) by profession. Tried to kill myself 4 times already over the course of my life. I am in my 20s. Actually, early 20s. Abused, neglected, assaulted and bullied heavily as a child. Was an alcoholic and delinquent at 13. Already had 3 failed engagements before I even turned 23. Cheated on and lied to.

I have saved lives more than I care to count. Lost a dear friend to suicide. I am consumed by the guilt that I couldn’t help him. I am consumed by the guilt that I am a hypocrite. I save others but i can’t even save myself.

I live to serve people. It gives me joy seeing other people have better lives from the time they first met me. I don’t think I have found anything more fulfilling than that. It gives me the reason to live. i have no reasons to live for myself but i figured I can use this life so other people can benefit from my knowledge and experience.

Everyday, my existence is a constant pain that no one else knows but me. I try to run away from a past that haunts me every day of my life.

I have a good life and a good facade but I don’t think anybody deserves to be haunted by my demons too, that’s why I never told anyone.

Not sure if many can understand.

Don’t be like me. Don’t let your demons eat you. Seek help. Someone out there is stronger than you and can help you fight it. I haven’t found mine. I don’t think I will. Maybe someone who had worse demons than me and I wish someone like that doesn’t exist because I’d never wish what i went through on my worst enemy.

New Confession

did a German fuckk your wife dirty American, die 3rd Reich shall rise again from the ashes of the empire

Adolf Hitler

Related Confessions

I used to go online, find girls to have online relations with. I was a teenager. It started from the start of high school, when I was 15. At worst was F, that was my bottom barrel. It was gross. I don’t know how old she was but she was younger. It was near the end, during the pandemic. I was older, she was younger. I don’t know how much younger, but I was 16 I think. She was younger. Like 2 or 3 years younger, I dunno? It was gross of me. I regret doing it but I fear my regret isn’t because of how I hurt someone, took advantage. They were ok with it in the moment, we were both on the same hookup site. But I was gross. No question about it. There was T too but that was a 16-18 age gap. I deleted the accounts. I was just gross.