My older brother and I have always been quite close. I was the first person he came out to as gay when we were adolescents. Jump ahead a few years later,

8 years

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My older brother and I have always been quite close. I was the first person he came out to as gay when we were adolescents. Jump ahead a few years later, I was a high school freshman and he was a junior. He had a really nice boyfriend, and since I spend a lot of time with my brother, his boyfriend and I became quite good friends, too.
One day, I came home from school and heard a loud thumping noise coming from upstairs. I went up and heard my brother and his boyfriend grunting each other’s names. His bedroom door was open just enough so that I could see inside. The two of them were up against the wall, backs turned, so neither of them noticed me. Immediately, I was horrified and I fled the house quickly after. I went three whole days without talking to my brother because I was so embarrassed. After a while, everything went back to normal and I had forgotten what I saw. Well, one night, I found myself picturing it all over again while I was m***********. The worst part is that the thought of it is what pushed me ‘over the edge’. As soon as I was done, I felt absolutely awful, and I’ve never thought about it that way again. My brother and I are now in our twenties now, and I still never told him what I saw. I couldn’t bring it up knowing what I did afterwards.

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i created you,
just to watch you suffer.

Evil Jesus

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