My name’s Kai, and I’ve been in love with my best friend for as long as I can remember… at first, I didn’t know what it was.. I was just, clingy I thought. And he didn’t seem to mind, my best friend’s the shy type, but he’s very sweet once you get to know him.. he’s cute.. smart.. funny.. sincere and goofy. He’s a bit of a nerd but that just makes me love him more, I wasn’t sure at first about how I feel about him but well.. the way I feel.. couldn’t be simple friendship. And what happened last night, well it just confirmed it. It was his birthday yesterday, his parents were out of town so we decided to celebrate it at his house. We aren’t the most popular people, but we did have a small group of close friends. One of them brought liquor for fun, at first my best friend was against it, but I convinced him; what harm could a few drinks be? Right..? Well, turns out none of us can hold our liquor, most of our friends got wasted. Me and my best friend got bored and went up to his room to watch a movie, or play video games.. i don’t really remember. But I do remember.. that is while he sat next to me, I couldn’t help but stare at him. Ignoring whatever we were doing, he noticed and asked me what was wrong, or something along those lines. I don’t remember if I said anything, all i remember is holding onto his hand and giving him a kiss.. I don’t remember much… just that I woke up beside him seated next to me on the floor, the exact same position we were the night before.. as the memories rushed back to I immediately stood up.. disgusted at what I had done.. I got my best friend drunk then probably made out with him.. he was still asleep when I left but I couldn’t look at him the same way.. I just.. I feel disgusting for taking advantage of him like that.. i don’t know what to say… or even if he remembers..