I am a low-risk registered s** offender. 3 years ago I downloaded child p**********. Now, not a second goes by when I don’t infinitely despise myself. The only reason I don’t kill myself is because I don’t want to cause trouble for my family, my landlord, the police, the coroner, etc. I know I will never reoffend, but I still don’t think I can ever see myself as anything but an evil person.
I live in a rooming house with others like myself. I want to get a good job and my own apartment, but my criminal past makes it difficult. One of my roommates was convicted of kidnapping and r***** a young girl in 2001. It was not his first offense. He was sentenced to life in prison, but he appealed six times and somehow managed to get his sentence reduced. He was released last January, and now lives down the hall from me. He is a self-righteous religious fanatic. So is his wife, who visits frequently (no women or children are allowed in the house, but our landlord refuses to enforce the rule.) I sometimes catch this roommate ogling the neighbor kids through the kitchen window. The way he interacts with me and our other roommates is the same way that he groomed his victims – offering goodies, asking for help with obscenely simple tasks, etc.
It’s only a matter of time before he victimizes another child.

I very much want to end his life before that happens.