I read many confessions here, but none of them are the same of even close to my confession. I feel guilty, I feel guilty every minute, every second..I’m so devastated.
Let me tell you the story.
I live in a third world country, my family isn’t rich. I live in a simple house, a very small house with a vary small garden. One day a stray dog gave birth to four male puppies, they were so cute and fluffy. I love them.. but since our house is small and we ain’t rich.. I cannot take them in, instead we let them stay in the small garden.. the garden was very small and it has no fences, and it is also close to the sewer/canal. My brother and I built a roof so that they won’t get wet when it rains.. we love them.. sincerely. When the puppies started to crawl, they always fall in the canal, so we constantly checks on them. I cared for the puppies. I cared for them very much. The puppies grew well, they learned to walk, run and play.. We fed them, I constantly checks on them, I pick them in the sewers when they fall. I noticed that their mother is very thin.. she was indeed a stray dog.. she was very thin, like dying.. we fed her too. But I admit, it isn’t enough. Every time I check on the puppies, the puppies would always playfully run towards me, and starts licking. Whenever one or two of the puppies fall in the canal, their mother isn’t rescuing them,, She just watched as her puppies screams and cries. They couldn’t save themselves because they were still small and they still have small legs. Our household is always devastated every night, no one could stay asleep, because every now and then the puppies fall into the canal as they try to find their mom for milk. 2 am, 12 midnight.. I always get up from my bed to pick them up. We were all so stressed. I cursed them for being so annoying.. Few nights passed and we decided that this can’t continue anymore.. Early morning we picked the puppies and put them in the forest.. we fed them milk. I didn’t turned around to see them..
Right in this moment.. I hear their mother’s cry.. I pray that the nearby houses would adopt the puppies. I feel guilty.. I want the dog to stop crying.. I want everything to stop…