3 years
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I had really convinced myself I was ready for it but I was not. Maybe there is no truly being ready for it. He gave me everything I had asked for, was so gentle about it. Warmed me up until I was begging for it. But as I was head down a** up and the pressure of his c*** pushing unto my a** got too intense I was panicking. Not like I had not tried toys countless times. But something about it being a real c*** was different. I tried to resist but his hands went to my hips and then a quick burning sensation and my body and head were fighting it. I was saying no please don’t in my head I have no clue if I was saying it out loud. I was shaking and felt my a** quivering and trying to push him out but the head was in. I was squirming and he gently talked to me and stroked my back. Swearing he would make it good for me. Then his hands were on my hips again and he pushed all the way in. I actually was conscious of his balls against mine. I was gasping and moaning and the intensity was so much. He slowly pulled back and I stupidly thought he was going to pull out but he thrust deeply again. By this point I was sobbing and clawing the sheets trying to desperately squirm away. It was not painful it was just too intense. My head was screaming for this not to happen, do not let another man put his c*** in your a**. But he just kept slowly pushing and withdrawing and my head was a wreck. He started moving a little faster and I felt so ashamed of myself and vulnerable. At some point I felt my own urine running down my leg because every time he pushed deep my muscles were so gaped and weak I could not even hold my bladder. Barely able to breathe. I felt his weight more on me and he gently put me fully on my stomach. He laid on my back and slipped an arm under me and pulled my face out of my arms by grabbing the hair on the back of my head. Told me to look in the mirror and I wanted to crawl in a hole and die seeing the helpless expression on my face. This is what you wanted he reminded me. This is what you asked me to do. And then he kept me looking at my own face and his as he began to truly f*** me. It seemed to go on forever and since he had lubricated me and himself so much he was effortlessly thrusting over and over. My head was a train wreck. Bouncing around from self shame and self loathing to god help me I really am a f** and omg how can this feel so f****** incredible. He told me to ask for it and I blurted out omg please f*** me. I was so exhausted and gaping and could barely breath while I was wailing loudly. And when it was time he told me to beg for it and as soon as I blurted out please c** in me he was sinking his teeth into my shoilder and growling as he made hard deliberate thrusts as deep as he could. Still seeing my own face in the mirror as he recovered laying on my back I could feel the wetness under my groin and realized I must have pissed myself. When his limp c*** fell out of me he got off me and went to the bathroom and got dressed and he said he was sorry I was feeling so ashamed and asked if i wanted him to go. I nodded and he left, saying only that he was not going to send me the video from his phone or delete it until I told him what I wanted him to do. Yes I had asked him to video him f****** me for the first time. The narcissistic virgin f** in me wanted that.

Hours of self hatred and shame and a shower later he texted me. Told me i had been very good as a first timer and he was sorry i clearly felt so much shame. He said he emailed me the video because he figured I would never be able to ask for it.

A few hours later and having watched the video multiple times i texted him and thanked him for forcing me to see my natural beautiful self. And asked him to help me be better for him. To please come back and f*** me again.

New Confession

Im 40 yo, married 3 children, So the past almost 9 years I been going to this little Asian Ladys place for my haircut, Shes 60, 5ft 2, 120/130 lbs, great athletic body, bubble b***, Nice Firm breast, She cuts hair and Massages, While she cuts hair she is in Heels, Bra and P****** and a silk black apron and Im always Feeling and touching on her, She positions her breast in my face and she always smells Amazing she was very close the other day I my fingers slid in her p****** and I felt all BUSH AND I always had a fantasy of C****** inside of a Hairy Bush, her name is Ling mi shes from Vietnam but speaks clear English and sounds like an American, I asked her how much to Let me give her a c******* we discussed it and she took me upstairs to her loft apt, big king sized bed She Stripped Naked laid on the bed with her legs spread open and her Gorgeous Bush just Awaiting my shaft, her pretty freshly pedicure pink toes Waiting for sum mouth attention I got in her bed after I Stripped and we started kissing and touching eachother’s bodys, Her Head game was incredible and she was determined to make me Shoot it wasn’t long after i slowly slid into her I immediately exploded and i was rubbing her c*** as she was c****** with me, I told her to get in d********** position and i spit on and rubbed my d*** as i slid it in again and just a few thrusts I Came in her p**** again, we both got into her shower and I washed her we kept kissing and touching, shes an amazing kisser, we got out after round 3 in the shower and we dried off and She layed on her bed naked and I rubbed lotion all over her body and then I had to whip it out and Put the tip on her bush and Sprayed my juices on her Hairy p**** and rubbed it using my soft shaft, This is what I needed for so long as we dont have alotta s** in my marriage.

Related Confessions

I have always had s** with girls and women . I have great s** with my wife . She is adventurous and will try anything. In the summer we can be driving . This is in England . She will ask me to pull over and stop . To have s** in the car or behind a hedge . We even go dogging . But i was looking round the internet for s***** stimulation . I was wanking . I looked at gay p*** . I was soon having an o***** . Watching a guy sucking his friend . Secretly i wanted to try g****** . I joined a local gay chat group . I entered my description . Being honest . Six foot three and a half . 18 stone . Age mid 30s . I had a few replies . Mostly older men . They didn’t interest me . Then i got a message from a guy who claimed to be 30 . He even sent picture to prove it . He had his own house and like me he is married . His wife had gone on holiday with her friends for 17 days . He had s** with guys when he was younger . I arranged to go to his house . I drove to it . When i arrived i was feeling nervous . Was he really who he said he was . He opened the door . He looked like his picture . He invited me in . We sat and had a coffee . I didn’t know what to say and how to start . He did it for us . After the coffee he went upstairs . When he came down he was naked . When i saw him it gave me an erection . When i stood up he could see my erection in my trousers . He came over to me and unzipped my trousers getting my c*** out . He asked me if i wanted to go upstairs . I knew what he meant . I followed him to the bedroom . Where i undressed . We got on the bed . He was holding my erection . He started to lick it . Then he had it in his mouth . He was giving me a b******* . I lay back and let him do it . With one hand he was touching my balls . He was sucking .He was using his lips and his tongue . He had my c*** deep in his mouth . His lips were at the base of it . He held me there when i was having my o***** . When he took his mouth away . He showed me that he had my c** in his mouth . He swallowed . Then he lay down on his back . I knew what he wanted . Put his c*** in my mouth . I tried to do what he had been doing to me . I was sucking and licking . The i was moving my mouth up and down his c*** . While all the time i was using my tongue . He was telling me . Oh god i am going to c** . He was groaning . I stopped moving my mouth and only used my tongue . He was c****** in my mouth . Now we get together at least once every month . For s** . I keep it secret from my wife .